Okay, so. TB is a gamer. He has some buddies that he interacts with online in the games he plays. As with any group of kids, there is one I find objectionable. I tolerate him because A) TB is old enough to cut people out of his social circle if he deems them unworthy and B) Telling him to cut this kid out will, of course, make him all the more fun to play with over the interwebs.
So I just let it be. However, there are days, like today where I would have happily drop-kicked that little shit.
Because whenever TB finds something I told him to do not to his liking, he acts JUST like this kid. It’s rare, but he did it tonight.
TB: Can’t I play until 9:30??
Me: No. Shower.
(Note: TB getting a shower is a 30-45 minute process because it includes a 20 minute pre-shower constitutional so I’m pretty firm on the 9PM shower since lights out is at 10 and we like him to read some before then)
TB: Gaaaauuuuuuhhhhhhhnnnnnggggg (with leg-shaking added for dramatic effect)
Me: Employing MOMMY DEATH GLARE OF DOOM… Get. A. Shower.
TB: (To his fellow gamers) Uuuuhhhh…. I gotta go.
Me: Excellent choice Sir!!
I have perfected the MOMMY DEATH GLARE OF DOOM. I just stand still, narrow my etes, lean forward ever so slightly, set my jaw, and raise one eyebrow. My kids have been conditioned over the years to see the MDGOD and know that they had best get their asses in line OR ELSE.
Mommy’s next trick after that is to completely lose her shit. Don’t nobody wanna see THAT!!