I Am a Planner (UPDATED)

Okay, so. I am my Mother(s) daughter in that I like to plan. I say Mother(s) because both my Mom and my Mimi (stepmom) are organized planners. I find planning to be a balm. Lists soothe my soul.

So when a crisis situation arises, I like to make plans A-D immediately. That way, I have something to pull out of my bag of tricks instead of flolundering around trying to get my/our shit together.

Last week, there was no plan and that scared the ever loving shit out of me.

My Mother-in-Law has been ill. She, much like her son, rules in the understatement department. She told us she’d “Not been feeling well”, “Didn’t have much of an appetite”, and “Had lost some weight”. Then, last week, there were TESTS. She had to be admitted to the hospital and given a blood transfusion along with some IV nutrients.

After the scans came back, there was no plan. TWH left work in a panic and drove the 5 hours to his parents. I stayed behind and worried. I made phone calls. I tried to cover all the bases that I could but I didn’t have a PLAN.

Because how do you plan for this shit?? How do you plan for the potential of your life never being the same again??

You don’t. You hang on by your fingernails and do what you can, when & where you can. You cry in restaurants. You ask your friends for prayers. You pray for this life that is so dear to you and yours. You worry. Lastly, you hope.

Because hope is all you have and all you can give. Hope IS the Plan.

And that Plan has to be enough.

Now, my Mother-in-Law is currently home resting. She is having a small procedure this week and we will be travelling back north for a larger surgery next Wednesday. I’m planning on taking my running shoes for stress, a power strip for the hospital waiting room, and a shitload of Hope.

And quarters. Those vending machines are some finicky bitches and we’re gonna need us some junk food.

Think about us next Wednesday if you get a minute. Pray, send good vibes, whatever works for you. I’ll add them to my Hope and be ever so grateful.

 

UPDATE: After the Surgeons Office called Monday to set the surgery for next Wednesday, the SURGEON called YESTERDAY to set the surgery for FRIDAY. As in the-day-after-tomorrow so we are going north tomorrow.  We obviously have a communication breakdown. Ugh. This does not inspire confidence y’all.  Be thinking about us, please.

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Ha Ha Cupcake

Okay, so. Many years ago, when TB was still in the single digits, he’d Nelson (from the Simpsons) “Ha Ha” someone when something unfortunate happened to them.

It. Drove. Me. NUTS!! I absolutely HATED it!! I reminded, and reminded, and REMINDED him not to say that to people. I thought it was hateful, and petty beyond measure.

One day, his class has gone on some field trip or other and I tagged along. When we arrived back at school, I checked him out. While I, and some other parents, were waiting for our offspring to collect their things and come to the office (we’re not allowed to go into the school during school hours here. We have to stay in the office) some kid in TB’s class was handing out birthday cupcakes. One little girl left the class before she got one and told her Mom she missed getting a cupcake. Her mom was busy telling her she could go back to the classroom and get one or she could get an alternative snack on the way home when TB walks in with his bag AND a cupcake. He immediately proceeded to say to the little girl. “I got a cupcake and you didn’t. Ha HA!!”

I saw red. I couldn’t believe how hateful my typically sweet, thoughtful, little boy was being by doing this.

I took action.

“Oh, Boogie!! You brought ME a cupcake!! How sweet!!” I exclaimed as I swooped down and plucked the cupcake from his chubby little hand.

TB looked at me like I’d lost my damn mind. “No Mommy. That’s MY cupcake”

I smiled at him and said “I’m sorry, but you lost this cupcake as soon as you were ugly to your friend because you got a cupcake and she didn’t. I’ve told you how nasty saying Ha Ha is and now you’re going to lose this cupcake because of it. Now let’s go get in the car”.

His principal saw the whole exchange and was valiantly trying not to laugh.

I have to say, here, that I had absolutely NO intention of eating the cupcake. I just wasn’t willing to let him have it because he’d been such a little jerk.

Then, we got in the car.

There was NO PLACE to put the cupcake!! None. I didn’t want to set it on the seat because I could just SEE me stopping suddenly and having to scrape icing off the dash and out of the carpet. I couldn’t put it in the cupholder because I’d have never been able to get it back out whole. I only had one option open to me at that point.

I ate the cupcake.

And it was GOOOOOD!!

I’m ashamed to admit that as I ate the cupcake, I extolled it’s yumminess to TB who was sitting in the backseat on the verge of tears.

“OH BOOGIE!!! I wish you could’ve had this cupcake!! This isn’t a bought -in-the-bakery cupcake!! It’s MOMMA MADE!!”

I felt kinda bad about that later.

BUT…..

We’ve never heard the snotty, derisive, HATEFUL “Ha HA” again!!

Life lessons people. You can nag, nudge, & prod until the cows come home but Life Lessons will work wonders.

“If you piss off your Momma, don’t be standing there holding a cupcake”.

Or DO be standing there holding a cupcake. It could be a lifesaver.

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Part of a Legacy

Okay, so. I was at work today and we were ass deep in alligators when a family walked in. Mommy, Daddy, & Little Boy. Little Boy was there for his FIRST haircut and his Dad brought him to T because T’s Dad gave HIM his very first ever haircut. I commented on how sweet that was when it hit me. We are part of a legacy. The shop has been around for 60 or so years and hes been in T’s family for 40 of those years.  We have given countless “First” haircuts. Very first, First Day of School, Graduation, Wedding. You get the picture.

And I’m planning on walking away from that.

I had to think for a minute about whether or not I was okay with my decision to move away if the opportunity presented itself.

I decided I was. I’ve worked in the shop for almost 14 years. I’ve met a lot of people. I hope I have somehow touched some lives the way some of the guys & families have touched mine. Will I be remembered a decade after I’m gone?? I don’t know. I do know that for awhile, I got to be a part of a legacy. One that will continue long after I move on to other things.

And I feel good about that.

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Priorities, Dammit!!

Okay, so. We’ve had some hellacious weather over the past few days here in SOLA. We’ve had a flood warning for days and to add to the fun, most of this morning was spent under a tornado watch as well.

I was at my friend Denise’s salon getting my hurr did this morning when the worst of todays storms hit. I had a head full of goo when suddenly, the wind kicked up to a frightening level. Denise & I looked at one another & Denise said “I hope we don’t get a tornado!!” to which I responded “Omigawd!! Hurry up & rinse this shit out of my hair. I’ll be damned if I’m gonna be pulled from the rubble of your shop or picked up in the next parish looking like THIS!!”

You’ve gotta have priorities, dammit. Not dying with a head full of color goo is one of mine.

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2012 Wasn’t So Bad. Bring On the New Year

I’m sitting here in the relative quiet of my living room, freshly showered from my morning walk/run, listening to the dishwasher take care of the breakfast dishes and I’m thinking about how 2012 didn’t suck. As a whole, it may have been a banner year.

We traveled most of the summer. Granted, they were only weekend trips but, hey, we had fun doing it.

I went to my first Blogger conference. Aiming Low Non Con was the perfect Conference Newbie experience. Yes, I had a meltdown (or two) but once I got over myself I had a ball. I met some of the Bloggers I adore in person and met some other kick-ass bloggers to stalk. I’d do it all over again in a heartbeat.

I’ve forged new friendships. Some here on the interwebz and some in real life. There’s a good bit of overlap & that makes me happy.

I’ve re-connected with some of my extended family. We’d lost touch over the years but finding them (and my roots) again has been a blessing beyond compare.

I’ve opened up about my mentally ill daughter. You guys have no idea how hard that was to “Put DOWN” as my friend Scott says. I did though. I put it down. I put it out there and it was, perhaps, the most freeing thing I’d done for myself in a long while. It’s allowed me to come out from under that burden and BREATHE. I will never be able to properly articulate my gratitude for all the pure LOVE you guys gave me after that. I can only cry happy tears all over my laptop and say THANK YOU.

I got to celebrate my ECB’s birthday with her in Washington, DC. Spending time with my oldest friend(s), people who have seen me through quite a bit in the last 20 years, was something I couldn’t have done (for financial reasons) even five years ago. That was so good for my soul.

Like I said, 2012 didn’t suck.

2013 isn’t looking so bad either. So far I have The Parade, my very FIRST 5K, and another trip to Washington, DC in the works so I can watch Miss A march in the Cherry Blossom Parade.

Here’s hoping for another kick-ass year.

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